I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're not piercing ourselves today.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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