That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
This is awkward. You have a four minute voicemail from me. I would delete it. I accidently hit your number on speed dial and called you while I was vomiting a mai tai.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
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