Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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