So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Randomize
