nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
