No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
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