I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Randomize
