can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
This can only be settled by a dance off.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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