Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
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