I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
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Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
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