guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
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