$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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