Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
