Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
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