I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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