all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
