She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize
