Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
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