"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
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