Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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