i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize