i don't plan on having that self control this summer
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
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