the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
There's even glitter on my cock...
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