butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Randomize
