how hairy? two words: wookie tits
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize