so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
