i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Randomize