My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
