Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize
