just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
