It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
