her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
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my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
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