Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
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hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
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Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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