But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
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