omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Randomize
