just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
i believe in u and ur pee
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
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