Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
