New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
