i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
if i can run in heels then i can drive
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
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