Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Haym$ered

  (734): View more from Michigan

  turn off your phone and go to bed

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  (248): Haym$ered (734): turn off your phone and go to bed http://tfl.nu/2w37
  Replies (7) Good night (1346) Bad night (399)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.

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  (443): i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week. http://tfl.nu/k6qn
  Replies (52) Good night (4546) Bad night (5740) Order T-Shirt
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  (956): View more from Texas

  I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward

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  (956): I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward http://tfl.nu/ltxx
  Replies (187) Good night (5336) Bad night (1204) Order T-Shirt
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  (514): View more from Quebec

  i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?

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  (514): i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome? http://tfl.nu/1uvu
  Replies (18) Good night (3475) Bad night (590) Order T-Shirt
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!

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  (832): Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!! http://tfl.nu/7qkz
  Replies (21) Good night (574) Bad night (2321) Order T-Shirt
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj

  (1-203): View more from Connecticut

  omg every time its on

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  (203): have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj (1-203): omg every time its on http://tfl.nu/6fsg
  Replies (25) Good night (2970) Bad night (983) Order T-Shirt
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?

  (1-330): View more from Ohio

  i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok

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  (330): yah i'm on my way- is everything ok? (1-330) i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok http://tfl.nu/s4ag
  Replies (35) Good night (960) Bad night (7108)
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  (956): View more from Texas

  It was like little house on the drunk prairie.

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  (956): It was like little house on the drunk prairie. http://tfl.nu/6z1y
  Replies (3) Good night (3339) Bad night (553) Order T-Shirt
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose

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  (781): im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose http://tfl.nu/q51l
  Replies (51) Good night (1581) Bad night (6356) Order T-Shirt
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  (218): View more from Minnesota

  Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder

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  (218): Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder http://tfl.nu/zi03
  Replies (10) Good night (3417) Bad night (767) Order T-Shirt
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  (620): View more from Kansas

  I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.

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  (620): I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks. http://tfl.nu/lsv9
  Replies (12) Good night (5909) Bad night (757) Order T-Shirt
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  (805): View more from California

  My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.

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  (805): My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore. http://tfl.nu/yzqd
  Replies (9) Good night (2006) Bad night (1074)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...

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  (480): It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless... http://tfl.nu/qugn
  Replies (8) Good night (1886) Bad night (839) Order T-Shirt
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.

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  (604): Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele. http://tfl.nu/5la0
  Replies (1) Good night (739) Bad night (171) Order T-Shirt
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  (714): View more from California

  So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.

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  (714): So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing. http://tfl.nu/3b6z
  Replies (5) Good night (270) Bad night (107) Order T-Shirt

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