I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize