is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
you traded sex for a burrito?
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
