stop calling my apartment porn island.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
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