i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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