i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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