I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I am available for nakedness
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize