I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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