Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
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