Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
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