well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
